Read This Before You Commit Branding Crimes Against Humanity
Listen up, folks - we've got a serious public service announcement today. There's an underground branding crisis happening, and it's putting innocent businesses at risk every single day. We're talking misguided logos, questionable color choices, and font disasters so offensive they should be considered war crimes.
That's right, we're shining a light on the shockingly rampant issue of branding crimes against humanity. And let's be crystal clear...if you still have anything less than a jaw-droppingly gorgeous, strategic brand identity, you're essentially committing these offenses too.
Now you're probably thinking "But my branding can't be that bad, can it?" Oh, it absolutely can - and likely is. Think about it...is your logo an illegible clip-art catastrophe? Do your colors just randomly clash like paint art gone terribly, terribly wrong? Are you still sporting those tragically outdated font artifacts from the 1990s?
If you answered yes to any of those, then congratulations! You're guilty of crimes so sinister, that your branding alone has set the luxury aesthetic back by decades. Mortified.
But don't start getting nervous yet - there's still time to redeem yourself! That's why we've put together this helpful guide of the most shocking branding crimes that need to be eliminated once and for all. Think of it as a chance for amends and brand rebirth.
You'll find troubling tales of logos that confused and traumatized rather than captivated. Stories of color palettes so distasteful they made viewers jump back in technicolor horror. And font pairings so unholy, that reading them is like trying to translate a foreign language.
Only by studying these poor branding downfalls, can we learn what must never again be repeated. It's a chilling, eye-opening look at how something as seemingly harmless as graphic design can quickly transfer into crimes against all tastemakers and influencers hold dear.
So consider yourselves warned - read on at your own risk. But also, read on for your own good. Your brand's life depends on knowing how to avoid these deadly creative sins. Let's start rehabilitating and begin your journey to ultra-luxurious redemption sooner than later.